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Writer's pictureNtando

Don't cheat, especially on your barber


11h00: Awe, it's that time again. Biweekly cut boys. It's not even that full today. Should only be here for like 30 minutes.

11h05: Shit! Where's Patrice at?

11h07: Don't tell me one of these lames is gonna cut my hair.


11h10: I can't come later on this week... FUck it

12h08: It has officially been an hour now. Nigerian pop music is blaring and it is being welcomed warmly. Men in their late 30's are singing along, full voice.

I will admit, the melody and lyrics are quite catchy.

12h40: The top 30 chart is now playing. We're into the early teen's. Chris Brown, Khalid and Ariana Grande territory. The physical attributes of the men would not suggest that they should know these break-up pop songs but here we are. Yet again, full voice and high notes attempted. I'm conflicted but I remain quiet.

12h50: So I just made eye contact with the trash barber. I've never seen any of his customers leave with a smile, he always catches the first-timers . Looked down immediately. Man's must be tripping.

13h00: Good thing I love reading articles and tend to write some of my own. I am now entertaining myself to bide time. I'm a nice guy so I don't want to look irritated, plus if I seem mad I'm afraid this nigga might fuck up my hairline.

13h14: I'm finally getting my opportunity with the back-up barber. He had quiet the line today, he's probably not that trash. A subtle head nod signalled me over.

"Neaten the top and fade me on the side, 2 steps please" these are the instructions I detail.

13h19: Lemme cav my twitter timeline.

13h21: "Nooo, not that low... I hate going to niggas who aren't my barber. If I wanted a brush cut I would've asked for a brush cut nigga." - these are my internal thoughts

... I don't make a sound and control my facial expressions.

13h40: I am mentally preparing myself for the pending roast session now. The niggas are gonna have a field day. Why do I make it so easy for them sometimes.

13h41: It's fine, this builds character.

13h42: "Lemme just cut it all off"


13h43: I'm not paying the full R50. He didn't even do what I asked

13h51: I'm tripping, it'll grow back in a few days. I have a brush cut for a week. It's cool, something new for Spring.

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